First things first, I have really bad taste.
Not in an ironic way; I genuinely have what my mum and friends would describe as "really bad taste." What I mean is that ever since I was little, I have been drawn to things that people describe as 'gaudy' and 'tacky.' From my longer than long nails, to the fifteen earrings in my right ear, to my penchant for 'frog green' hued items, pawn shops, Amazon (as a fashion destination) and my well-curated beret collection, I'm quite sure I leave the house looking more like Grayson Perry than I'd care to admit. I think nothing of wearing leopard print and snakeskin together; I think florals match tartans; I like red trousers. I even surprised myself last week when I bought burnt orange velour dungarees from a car boot sale.
Don't get me wrong, I would so love to be one of those Pleats Please, all-navy, box-fresh-loafers kind of girl, but it's simply not in my blood. I can't remember the last time I bought something tasteful, or grey, or useful, now I think about it. Even having worked in fashion, as I have done now for years, I've become impermeable to the well-clad respectable, stylish women around me, and what draws most comments is my love of colour. Deep down, I genuinely think orange looks best with green; red with pink and silver with gold. Wearing colour makes me feel better; I feel more awake, more 'jolly' (sorry, but I do).
Despite acknowledging my questionable taste, I'm going to make a bid for brights here and mount the best defence I can for wearing super clashing colours together. I've tempered it a little in order to prevent too many 'Cat Lady' trollers. I mean, come on, obviously navy and black are meant to be worn together.
If I'm ever stuck for what to wear, I fall back on what I call The Three Colours: gold, blue, and red. It always perks me up. The silk varsity jacket is JoyRich (the lining is all Statue of Liberty) and the cashmere skirt, worn as a dress, is Tomas Maier.
Green, yellow and orange as a combination should not be confined to cheap cocktails and sweet wrappers. I've taken two parts of a Marques'Almeida suit and swapped them. The orange top is vintage.
Blue and black should always been worn together. I like wearing these red wine heels with something like this teal jumper – it really sets the teeth on edge. The jumper is MM6, jacket JoyRich, jeans Marques'Almeida and shoes ASOS.
This is my dad's shirt from the '90s. He bought it from a ranch in Texas and I love it. Pink and red is my favourite clashing combination. The jeans are Marques'Almeida that I've cut myself and the shoes Commes des Garçons x Converse.
I know this is more Ugly Betty than Prada but I love aqua blues and yellow together; it's just so '70s, so Napoleon Dynamite, so gross. The top is Issey Miyake and the long sleeve is vintage.
A friend gave me this raw silk pink dress coat and I lived in it for a year. I wore it alone as a dress to one of the best parties I've ever been to. The red beret is American Apparel, jeans Marques'Almeida, and the coat is vintage.
This is my McDonald's look. For real. I live in this sheepskin coat in the winter. The dress is Hunza G and it's made from that gorgeous crinkle-stretch fabric that was banished to the '80s step-exercise class video, never to be seen again. Until now.
Wearing lots of shiny things together makes me very happy and every time I wear these silver trousers, someone shouts something to me out of a van. The coat is Shrimps, the T-shirt is Martine Rose and the trousers are Monki.
Follow Nellie on Instagram @NellieEden
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
31 Perfect Looks To Copy This January