Si, claro, mañana! A few weeks in Buenos Aires and you'll be as chilled as the Argentinians. Everything runs late, everything comes in pastry and everyone is beautiful. The party capital of South America attracts a lot of students and young people who touch down for a summer exchange programme and basically never leave. That's because life in Buenos Aires is really, really fun and a fraction of the cost of other major cities. Nicknamed 'the Paris of South America', the city has a more European feel than the rest of the continent due to its pretty streets and sprawling eating, drinking and going out culture. From leisurely mornings in Palermo Soho sipping mate (highly caffeinated herbal tea that absolutely everyone carries around in a flask) to out-of-this-world, slap-up steak lunches for less than £4, to the playground bars and glistening super-clubs that pulse with world-class DJs until 8am, it's a hedonist's dream.
Once you've got your head around the slang and you're over your fernet hangover (order fernet con coca at the bar), you can settle into the culture. Argentina has a complex social and political history and workers take to the streets seemingly every week to protest against government cuts with flags, banners and chants – just head to the Plaza de Mayo and you'll see. Every person in Argentina (both natives and expats) has an opinion about the government, from eight-year-old private school kids to homeless families living in passageways on the Subte (the underground.) The economy is pretty devastated, which causes all sorts of social problems among the population and poverty is rife, so the exchange rate from pounds to pesos can seem ridiculous (in the pound's favour.) Many older residents still talk about Eva Perón – the subject of Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical, Evita, starring Madonna, which caused quite a stir among loyal Peronists who claim she's painted in a terrible light.
Though not the most picturesque city, Buenos Aires has charm in bucketloads and its friendly, fiery atmosphere will make your head spin. If you have a week (or more) to spare, then lucky you, here's our run down of the best things to do, eat, drink and think about in the city.
Recoleta Cemetery
Go just before closing (which is at 5.30pm) when it's eerily quiet – it'll just be you, a few stray cats, the setting sun, and 5000 dead bodies.
Recoleta cemetery is listed as one of the ten most beautiful cemeteries in the world and you can lose hours admiring the sculpture and expensive mausoleums holding the rich, famous and influential of Argentina.
Many visitors head straight to Eva Perón's tomb, which is curiously difficult to find and much less grand than one might imagine. Eva was the second wife of the Argentine President Juan Perón. She died of cancer at 33 and is buried in her family mausoleum (Duarte) – not the Perón mausoleum – which is significantly more modest, and always surrounded by fresh flowers brought by visitors and admirers.
Photo: Reed Kaestner/Getty Images.
San Telmo Market
It's worth planning your trip so that it falls over a weekend because the best view of Buenos Aires is from the top of Defensa (street name) looking down during market day on Sundays. Every weekend, this street in the fairly run down area of San Telmo comes alive with music, theatre, puppetry, street tango, incredible food, clothes, antiques and art. You'll come away with a bunch of knick knacks you never knew you wanted.
Start at the top of Defensa, and walk at a leisurely pace through the crowds. Take a left on San Lorenzo (street name) to look at the smallest house in Argentina, the "Casa Minima", have a drink, listen to some live music, and be on your way. Stop again for a giant steak with salad at Desnivel (855 Defensa) then get back on the road – which ends in a square where, around 6pm (it's often late!) a tango show starts.
Photo: Getty Images.
The Evita Museum
Do not underestimate the people's love for Eva Perón (or Lionel Messi, or Che Guevara for that matter.) Unless you want to get into a fight, steer clear of criticising these three in public. Likewise DO NOT bring up the Falklands War! Or Las Malvinas, as the Argentinians say.
A rags to riches tale, the beautiful Eva grew up poor and was the youngest of five children whose father left them for his other family. She moved to Buenos Aires to pursue a career as an actress, appearing on stage and in films before meeting and marrying Colonel Juan Perón, who went on to become the President of Argentina in 1946. While critics (and there are a fair few) believe Eva was a social climber and obsessed with fame, the rest adore her for her humanitarian work and support for workers, women, children, the elderly and those on the fringes of society.
Eva's image – with her signature bleached hair – is absolutely everywhere in Buenos Aires, most prominently on the Ministry of Social Development building which is smack bang in the middle of a giant road called 9 de Julio Avenue – which happens to be the widest avenue in the world and a word of warning: crossing it is a challenge.
The Evita Museum is located on Juan María Gutiérrez and is a shrine to this working class heroine. You can learn all about her upbringing, her work, her death at 33, and her infamous style. If you care to understand the country, it's a must.
Parques de Febrero
Take a stroll around Parques de Febrero in Palermo Hollywood (the adjacent town to Palermo Soho), also sometimes called Bosques de Palermo. Enjoy the rose garden and picturesque white bridge over the lake and watch the seriously cool female rollerbladers fly around the track on the outskirts of the lake. If you walk far enough, you’ll get to the Planetarium (pictured) – the perfect place for your afternoon "I'm in Buenos Aires" Instagram. Lots of street performers such as jugglers and hula-hoopers practice in this area so it's a fun place to hang out.
After dark, the park turns into a cruising area for trans sex workers and there are often cars queued around the block.
Las Cabras
Ok vegetarians, brace yourselves. Menus are not all that accommodating to vegetarians, dairy intolerances, gluten intolerances and vegans. They do what they do (steak and ice cream) exceptionally well but from previous experience, the cuisine is really not well catered to non-meat eaters. Which is not cool, but is something you have to be aware of if you're a foodie and a vegetarian or have an intolerance.
That said, meat-eaters, rejoice, because the steak in Buenos Aires is second to none. The best cuts are the 'bife de lomo' and the 'bife de chorizo' (not sausage, still steak).
Our top restaurant recommendation is Las Cabras in Palermo, on the corner of Fitzroy and El Salvador (these are the names of two roads – and that's often how people will give you directions in Buenos Aires, saying it's between one road and another because the city is laid out in a grid system, like New York.) You can order the Gran Bife de Las Cabras here for about £6 which you can easily share between two! Go early to avoid queues, it’s a very popular place.
If you'd like to go more upmarket, we recommend Don Julio in old Palermo, on Guatemala 4699 (the road name and number) You may have to book.
Finish it off with a kilo of ice cream at a parlour – they're on every corner. Fun fact: you can get a kilo of ice cream delivered to your door!
Photo: Via @sofiamarquesdacosta.
Polo
Don't be fooled, it's nowhere near as easy as they make it look. Polo is a very popular sport in Argentina, almost as popular as football. In the current world rankings, nine of the top 10 players in the world are from Argentina. So if you're ever going to watch a game of polo, this is the place to do it. The season runs from September to December, and it's possible to buy tickets on the door (or reserve ahead of time) at Campo Argentino de Polo, where you can watch a match against a stunning backdrop of the city for around £20.
Dog Watch
It's not exactly a "tourist attraction" but look out for the epic dog walks going down all over the city. There isn't an abundance of space in Buenos Aires (most people live in apartments rather than houses) but lots and lots of people own dogs anyway. And dog walkers walk up to 15 dogs at a time – which is quite a sight. You'll often bump into a harem of dogs waiting for their walker outside a shop.
Tigre
Tigre is a town laid out around a huge delta about an hour from Buenos Aires by train. If you're going for a day trip, book a boat tour along the delta from one of the boat stands in the train station when you get there and learn about the way of life in this stunning little place. Lots of Argentinians live in houses on stilts over the water, or set back amid private beaches, using little rowing boats to get around. There's a supermarket boat that comes round every day to deliver supplies. If you have a few days, you can book a house on the water through Air BnB with a private beach and really live the life!
We suggest you book a boat that takes you all the way back to the city as it's a really scenic journey, ending at sunset in the port which is packed with cafes and cute shops.
There's also a theme park in Tigre (Parque de la Costa) for the thrill-seekers...
Tango
While the kids prefer to listen to cumbia (the popular music in Argentina), the older generation is big into tango. As a tourist, there are plenty of dance halls around the city offering tango lessons for beginners – which feature incredible performances by professionals midway through and at the end.
You can see tango at San Telmo market on a Sunday, or take a journey to the colourful Caminito – in La Boca at the weekend to watch supremely talented men and women dance with passion and precision around a three-metre dance floor – often brushing past your table as you're enjoying a glass or two of vino rojo.
Photo: Eyes Wide Open/Getty Images.
La Boca
Getting a ticket to watch Boca Juniors in La Boca is no mean feat. Either you part with a lot of cash, or you know someone. If you're English, better keep quiet in the queue as it can be hard to get in, even if you have a ticket and they do not like loudmouths. There's no alcohol in the stadium because of a very violent past (and present) between Bocca fans and River fans so expect a pungent smell of weed instead. When Bocca score, fans climb up the fences surrounding the pitch to celebrate. Watch out for the cute football kids who are secured to the fence by weaving a jumper in the gaps. You'll learn the chants in no time.
Pacha
Ah, Pacha, that sweet, sweet cherry. If you're into clubbing, look no further. Pacha (pronounce it Pa-cha not Pa-sha in the taxi or you'll never get there) is located a little outside of the city, so the journey costs a little more than usual and you'll get dropped off in a car park. The big white building with the cherry on top attracts queues and queues of youngsters so get there early (by which we mean midnight, Argentinians go out late.) The dress code is exceptionally glam – no trainers allowed, and boys must wear long trousers, even if it's 30 degrees. World class DJs play at Pacha, from Heidi to Jamie Jones so book tickets if it's a big headliner. There's always an incredible lineup of dancers in sequin pants in the main room, and cooling mists sprayed into the crowd throughout the night. Every alcohol comes with a mixer called 'Speed' – contents unknown – that will keep you awake until 7am, when you can head outside to watch the sun come up by the outdoor decks. It's heaven.
The LGBT clubbing scene in Argentina is super-fun and welcomes all orientations – we highly recommend Sitges. Argentina legalised gay marriage four years before the UK, and has some of the most supportive, progressive laws for trans people in the world.
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