Maybe during pregnancy you feel bloated, tired, and nauseated, and sex is the furthest thing from your mind. Maybe you're at a point at which hormones are sending your libido into overdrive, and you can't get enough. Either way, you do you: Sex during pregnancy is perfectly safe, although doctors do recommend that you skip missionary position come the third trimester, since lying on your back can reduce the amount of blood going to your baby and put strain on your hips.
Even if you're raring to go, though, intercourse can become uncomfortable or logistically difficult later in pregnancy, which is why we tapped sex therapist Vanessa Marin to give us pointers on the best positions for people who are expecting. Click through for her picks, as well as her insight on how your libido can shift as you're waiting for baby.
Face to face
Sometimes, eye contact is just what you're looking for. "This position is ultra-romantic and sensual," Marin says. "Your belly will barely get in the way, and you can still be super close." Share this moment of calm before the baby storm.
Lotus
In this position, the penetrator sits cross-legged and the penetratee sits on his or her lap, facing each other. "This is another super romantic one," Marin says. "Wrap your arms around each other and peek down at your growing belly."
Woman on top
"You're in control of the angle and the pace, so you can make it comfortable for you," Marin points out — deep penetration may not feel as good to you as your pregnancy progresses. Being on top also offers you plenty of clitoral stimulation.
The Drape
In The Drape, the pregnant partner lies at the edge of the bed, with legs bent over the edge and feet on the ground, while the other partner stands. "This position requires you to have a bed or sofa that's waist-height for your partner, but it can be really comfortable," Marin explains. "Plus, both of you have easy access to your clitoris." Win-win.
Spooning
"This position can be great for slow, sweet, Sunday-afternoon sex," Marin says. "Your belly won't get in the way" — making this position great for late in pregnancy — "and you can even use one of those pregnancy pillows for extra support." Sometimes, low-impact sex is the best sex.
Doggy-style
Doggy-style won't put pressure on your belly, "and you'll get to feel like your old sexy self again."
Reverse cowgirl
"If you're starting to feel self-conscious about your belly during sex — there's no need to be, but lots of women do — try turning around when you're on top," Marin suggests. "You'll get a different angle, and your partner will get a really hot view."
"Being pregnant can do a real number on your sex drive," Marin says. "Some women report feeling exceptionally horny in the first trimester, minus all the unfortunate morning sickness. Other women feel their libidos kick into overdrive around the second trimester. Things generally slow down around the third trimester, but every woman is different."
There's no right or wrong here — do what makes you feel best. And check in with yourself emotionally. While "anxiety about being a mum and all the changes ahead can make you shut down," Marin explains, "feeling closer and more connected to your partner can make you feel more libidinous." Don't be surprised if you feel both within moments of each other. One universal upside to sex during pregnancy: Worrying about getting pregnant is not a factor.
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